Dear Fat Dudes,
Posted on October 3, 2012
I am here to tell you that you need to get on your knees and thank the world every muthalovin’ day that you have a penis. Granted, maybe you had trouble finding it this morning, but it is only because you have a penis that people are a touch kinder to you about your weight.
Know, that if you were a woman, if you were even 10 lbs overweight…some a-hole, somewhere, would find a way to point it out. It might be the a-hole as you make the horrible mistake of simply crossing the street who yells something from his car trying to impress his friends, it might be this a-hole who goes to the grocery store and is so disgusted by overweight women that he needs to blog about it, it might happen through anonymous blog comments that are left for you simply because you are going about your life and doing your job, as happened to the female news anchor in the clip below. Regardless, know that if you were cursed by being both fat and having to carry around a vag – IT WOULD HAPPEN.
Of course, I know, there are a lot of fat men who are in pain. Of course, I know that meanness knows no gender lines. But, I also know that the sh*t sandwiches are skewed horrifically NOT in a woman’s favor. Yes, there are some men where their own shame is enough. Their own feeling of being out of control and maybe not even being around for their kids in the future, that is enough. But, what if it didn’t matter if those things were enough to make you feel like sh*t everyday? What if society didn’t care? What if you felt like sh*t due to your weight AND the world decided to serve you up a double helping of a sh*t sandwich to go along with it?
Because that’s what happens to women. Everyday.
We live in a fatist (fat hating) society – the fat are despised (especially the women) and yet, the processed food is pushed. Doesn’t that seem wrong to you? It’s like admonishing the heroin addict while you help them shoot up.
Think I’m being too strict of a feminist, here? Do you think fat men have it as bad as women? Really? Then show me the fat, female, comedian married to her skinny husband on a popular sitcom. Oh, right, that doesn’t happen. But, it does the other way. A fat male comedian gets a skinny wife, no problem. But, if the female actress is fat, then she MUST have a fat husband. See Roseanne. See Melissa McCarthy. And if you don’t believe me on the fat guy gets the skinny girl tip, then see King of Queens.
People always say, “Well, that’s because women aren’t as concerned with looks as men are.” In other words, a skinny woman will date a fat guy, but not vice versa. There’s some truth to that. So, I say – STOP IT.
Straight women of the world, treat your chubby men to the same scrutiny that chubby women are subjected to. Show them magazines of hot, zero-body-fat-studs, tell them those jeans make their ass look fat, and tell them you’re not going to let them visit the velvet garden until they drop a few. Hit ‘em where it hurts, in the sex department. Once this happens enough, maybe even slightly overweight men (Hell, maybe even skinny ones! A girl can dream…) will start sticking up for the Rubenesque girls because they will know how it feckin’ feels.
Now, of course, there are men who fight this good fight already. However, until the “dating fat chicks” requisite jokes stop, until a guy is told to drop weight by a studio more frequently (as happened here), until GOOD men truly understand the scrutiny women’s bodies are placed under – then this bullshit will keep happening. A woman just doing her job will be served a sh*t sandwich. See video below.
So, Fat Dudes, if you are dating a skinny woman thank the stars everyday that she hasn’t turned on you. The cold truth is, the world would turn on you, if you were a she. So, get on your knees and thank her. Then drop a few and stick up for a fat chick.
Clearly, it’s the right thing to do.
Sweet Mother is updated daily-ish. If you’d like to follow this blog, you can do so by clicking the follow button at the top, right of the page. Also, my second, madly, wonderful, creation – Canadica – is up. Go here and check it out.
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