Since I was a kid I’ve been dreaming of the velvet mafia.  I thought I would get to LA and throw all of my heart and soul into working for a, “power gay.”  So, when a friend of mine at the Suckle N’ Sizzle told me about the secret, velvet, job fair, well, I was in.  I heard Neil Patrick Harris would be there.  I would’ve given my right rib to be his nanny.   I packed up my resume and put on my best power suit, a Tahari number I had left over from my summer job as a bank teller.  Booth after booth of gay greeted me when I entered the convention center.  There was a booth called, “Monster Up.”  A Lady…