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Sweet Mother’s Reggie Reader Profile #2 (Ok, fine, blogroll!)

It’s that time again.  It’s a wonderful, sunny, morning here in Socal.  I’m sipping my coffee and gently trolling around the posts of another blogger.  You see, I have such a great community here.  I want to pay it forward.  Now, how would I do that?  Well, if Oprah were in my immediate vicinity, I’d proudly proclaim, “I’VE MADE A GRATITUDE COLLAGE!”  It would consist of cut out pictures of friends and family, my Wifesy and doggie, and a great deal of the commentators and readers here at Sweet Mother.

 

I would thrust my Oprah-like gratitude collage up in the air and behind me, I would hear a tsk, tsk.  It would be my own mother standing over my right shoulder and shaking her head.

 

Her look would be saying, in a full Spanish accent of course, “Jou are in Jou’re late 30’s and jou are spending jour time making cutouts on cardboard to show jour tanks?  Dis is sad, berry, berry, sad.  If jou want to chow jour tanks, try calling jour real Moder eberry once in a while.  What is dis blog?  I no understand dis blogging.  Does it make any money at all?”

 

But, I don’t pay Sweet Mother’s Mother any mind because I’m an adult and can do as I please.  Thankfully, years of therapy have taught me that.  Now, I’d LIKE to throw my gratitude collage up in the air and scream my thanks to my many followers, as my vagina grows three sizes due to fulfilling one of Oprah’s proclamations, BUT I’m allergic to glue-sticks and Wifesy refuses to take me to Staples for supplies.  So, this Reggie Reader Profile series will have to suffice.  It is with a warm heart and a cold coffee that I bring you the next installment.  Please welcome….

 

MAGGIE O’C.

 

 

In this artistic, ghost like image of Maggie, something delightful has happened.  Besides a blurry spirit passing through Maggie and her two adorable dogs, Maggie has chosen KASHI cereal as her ‘fiber rich’ product of honor!  You do not know how happy this makes me.  Not only does Kashi cereal boast 9 grams of fiber – 9 GRAMS OF FIBER! – (and you thought you couldn’t give birth through your a**hole), but I also firmly believe it is…

THE LESBIAN CEREAL.

 

Here is my photographic evidence.  “Good Friends,” really?

 

"We've been roommates for 30 years, but we're just...good friends."

 

Yes, that’s what all the lesbos say in college!  She’s just my “good friend”.  We’re just getting “healthy” together.  Of course we spend all of our time in the bedroom, you have no idea how many calories, sex, I mean sit-ups can burn!

 

So, yes, Maggie has chosen THE cereal that is closest to my own heart and that of the Indigo Girls.  She is not, however, a lesbo.  Quite the contrary, it seems Maggie has created a gaggle of straightbies.  They are adorable and I picture them frolicking on her gigantic-sized deck.  Quite frankly, I picture myself frolicking on Maggie’s deck while Mags flips the burgers and her twin sisters feed me shots.  We eat an army of prime ribs together, a bucket of corn on the cob, gallons of handmade coleslaw, and as the drinks hit we argue politics, but not in any sh*tty kind of way.  In a “we can all agree to disagree” kind of way.  When the debate settles down, we all punch the poo out of her younger brother because he said something off color.  He finally screams, “OWWW!” loud enough and we relent taking him under the arm and tussling up his hair as if he were a toddler and not a full grown adult.  It feels like family and Mags does family good.  (Grammar D*cks, that was poetic license.  Pay attention.)

 

It’s true.  When you read Maggie’s stuff, you feel like you’re included at the barbecue.  She talks about naked museum strolls, and safety gear, and whether one should talk or not talk in a public restroom.  She talks about how to deal with a drunken sailor/ toddler and I say, who couldn’t use more advice like that?  Maggie writes well.  Her humor is spot on.  She deserves more readers.  I’ve said this about her from the very beginning.

 

Mags started this whole “journey” (Thank you, Oprah!) as a weight loss blog, but it seems to have morphed into something more and for that I’m happy.  It’s not that you can’t do an exciting weight loss blog, it’s that Maggie shines when she’s talking about the everyday.  It’s like a window into her life and it makes you want to grab a seat at the picnic table.

 

So, tell the cook how you like your burger, FOLLOW MAGGIE, grab a beer, and then just sit back and read.  You’ll be glad you did.

 

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Sweet Mother is updated daily.  If you’d like to follow this blog via email or through wordpress, you can do so by hitting the follow button at the top of the page.  If you’d like to be a featured reggie, start reading, and commenting here.  That’s a start. 

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You might also like:

Why Did You Unfollow Me Today?

Reggie Reader Profile #1

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Photo creds:  kashi pics are ours, all ours!  Prunes Feature pic

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50 thoughts on “Sweet Mother’s Reggie Reader Profile #2 (Ok, fine, blogroll!)

    1. loooooollll. it’s wholesome even with lesbian cereal and the suggested thought of birthing a baby through your a-hole??!! godderm it, i tried so hard to sweet-motherify it up and not lead with my vagina! i think it’s because maggie is so nice…i’m blaming it on her. loooolll. xo, sm

      1. Wholesome?! I think you lost the wholesome post award with this gem: “as my vagina grows three sizes due to fulfilling one of Oprah’s proclamations.” Every female reader collectively did a Kegel, in solidarity, is my bet.

        But, from one mama to another, I love you for your rapier wit and potty mouth. This was a sweet post (sweet:slang vs sweet: wholesome) and I’ve really enjoyed the 4 Maggie posts I’ve read so far. Thanks mom. I needed this to pull me out of the ridiculous crisis that my son’s 20th birthday thrust me into. ;-) Nice of you to share the wealth with Maggie… she’s fun to read, and you provide my daily dose of humor with each post.

      2. you had me at kegels!!! everyone should be doing them!! lol. yeah, i love mags. hope you enjoy and follow her. she deserves it. and really, REALLY glad you enjoyed the post. xoxox, sm

  1. Never really thought of Kashi as a lesbian cereal, but then again what do I know. I ate raw oatmeal out of the package in college. Though in my defense, I didn’t have a microwave or a stove, and I was probably stoned, so it tasted better than it probably should have.

    1. i had a male friend in college who was drunk and ate a raw potato in my kitchen as i watched in horror. i was over at those newel apts at the time… was that what they were called? it was so long ago. ah, rutgers. xo, sm

      1. i feckn did. i feckn did have a hackey sack. but, i was a weird crossbreed. i lived on cook for 2 yrs and then i moved off campus. hardenburg street one year and then hartwell another, by the ale n’ witch. i lived with a bunch of my teammates. it was fuuuuuunnn and boozy. ;)

  2. Sounds like good stuff (both cereal and Maggie); Kashi being one of my fav’s as well, but I just heard last week that one should consume chocolate (dark, darker, darkest) for breakfast as well. Fiber and chocolate — what could be better. Will check out Maggie’s musings — I’m always up for being entertained. HI-larious post, as usual, M. :).

    1. glad you liked it, brig. definitely check out, mags. she’s worth it. and YEEEESSSS to the dark chocolate and red wine…you know reversatrol or tol (sp?) and all that? loool. xo, sm

    1. well, i don’t know about other lesbians, but for me and wifesy, it’s usually the sound of 1,000 angels screaming. wait, did i just compliment or insult myself? i meant to compliment… oh, bugger… xo

  3. Don’t want to rain on any parades thereby causing multiple bubbles to burst, but Oprah would never use the word vagina. She bellows: Vvvaaaaajaayyyyjaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! and then Dr. Phil appears like Puxatony Phil out of Oprah’s vajayjay and ruins someone’s life.

    Other than that, thanks for the blog recommendation or blrec™. I will definitely check it out.

  4. I had no idea Kashi was such a lesbian cereal. Here I have been making my own granola cereal from scratch and all this time there has been a pre made lesbo cereal just a waiting on me.

  5. I honestly don’t know what’s funnier, this blog or the comments following this blog. Good stuff. I looooooooove Kashi cereal and the husband always makes fun of me. Now I know why.

  6. “1000 screaming angels”? Has anybody ever heard an angel scream? I’m trying to hear it in my head and I just can’t. It’s gotta be better than the noise I make during sex…which is silence…cause my vagina has cobwebs on it. Gotta find myself a playmate…boy or girl…I’m not fussy. ;-)

    Great post as usual. I’m going to go and check Maggie out. I’m following a lot of blogs already (and I don’t have time to read them all with my new job) but I’m going to be giving my blog roll a facelift tomorrow.

    Luv u mother. xo

  7. SM! you rock my face off! Thank you so much for the post and you are invited up to Portland for ribs any time! You are so kind to help other bloggers find their way on here. I hadn’t noticed about Kashi being the Good Friends cereal…I was always in it for the farts.

    xoxoxox

  8. Reblogged this on Someone Fat Happened and commented:
    Thank you Sweet Mother! Go visit Sweet Mother at sweetmotherlover.wordpress.com. The support of fellow WordPressers has been so inspiring and I’m so grateful. Sweet Mother is so funny it makes me happy and not jealous which is surprising because I can be quite petty when I want.

  9. Sweet Mama … sweet Jesus! What a great way to start this gorgeous Tuesday morning in NorCal …. With hubby still sleeping upstairs, it was very hard not to burst out laughing out loud – at both your bloggie about Maggie and the comments made by your followers! I’m sold! I love Maggie’s blog and now looking forward to reading more of yours!

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