This story is so funny and so strange (and yet not so strange) that my fingers are practically dancing off the keyboards.  I saw this story on the HuffPo yesterday, but wanted to wait and let it marinate a bit before I wrote about it.  This morning, I read a few more articles about it.


Oh Lawd, here it goes, the meat of the thing is this:


Cecil Chao Sze-tsung, a Hong Kong property billionaire, has offered up $64 million dollars for a reasonable man who is capable of marrying his GAY daughter.


Let’s all pause for a second…




That’s Gigi on the right…


Yes, this has happened.  Gigi Chao, a good looking woman of 33 years old, married her gay partner in France 5 months ago.  But, daddy refuses to accept this reality.  He’s offered up a huge bounty for any man capable of turning his daughter straight.


And then the inevitable happened…Gigi was flooded with emails.  Marriage proposals were offered from all over the world.  One of them was even from an American gay guy.  Oh, the lengths people will go to keep up appearances, if (and this is a big IF) the price is right.


The surprising part is that the daughter, Gigi, is TOUCHED by what her father has done.  TOUCHED!  She sees it as an act of love.  She says, “he just thinks I deserve better.”


Better?  Oh, I have such a problem with that word.  Let’s go over the facts here — the woman is rich (an heiress, in fact), she’s young, AND she’s attractive.  Does daddy honestly think she just hasn’t found the right guy?  Or can’t?!


She-sus Christ.  It’s such a strange story, but I’m not as enraged as you might think I would be.  There are numerous reasons for this.  Let me go over two of the main ones.


1.  My brother was also lightly propositioned by my parents to “leave the gay” for money.  What I mean by that is, they offered to give him a sum of money (some kind of inheritance) IF he married a woman.


I found it intensely humorous, even more so then the proposal of Mr. Chao.  A cousin of mine looked at me with “sad eyes” and told me about my parents plan.  My response?  I laughed.  I laughed hard.  First of all, my parents are not the Rockefellers and there ain’t nobody, nowhere, going to pretend they ain’t gay for a couple of mere rupees.  Sorry, but it’s true.  I looked at her and said, “What?  My parents are not the Hiltons!  That’s not a threat at all.  For feck sake, he (my brother) makes more money then they ever did!”  Not that you can put a price tag on living your life as honestly as possible, but still!!!!  What feckin’ money??!!


I mean what is wrong with people??!!


2.  The girl is just trying to respect her parents, while at the same time doing whatever in the feck she wants.  I so get this.  I tried to walk this line for many, many years.  I called it trying to live with “grace.”  I always thought, in regard to my parents, “Yeah, yeah, I know you want me to get married to a dude and live ten minutes away from you…”  However, I always, ALWAYS, knew (whether I was gay OR straight, in fact) that it was NEVER going to happen.  I always knew it was THEIR wish and not mine and as a complete, whole, adult, person, I only have an obligation to live authentically AS MYSELF.  That means answering only to myself and maybe my higher power.  (My higher power by the way happens to think mostly everything is bullsh*t.  She’s a smart girl.)  That is the beautiful knowledge that comes out of leaving your parents house.  I suggest everyone do it, sooner rather than later.


Now, at a certain point – this whole idea of living as you want, while not ruffling your parents or society’s or your church’s feathers – well, this whole idea will come to a head.  When it comes to a head, you have to choose.  You or them.  It’s, unfortunately, very simple.


There will be consequences once you choose – some will be positive, some will be negative.  For example, my mother has come around a bit.  She accepts my partner because she knows me and she knows that I am going to do what I want.  I think she has even, slowly, very slowly, grown to like her.  My father, on the other hand, I have pretty much written off as a lost cause.  It’s sad because I like my dad, but I’m not willing to play the whole, “I’ll come see you, but my partner stays at home or outside,” game anymore.  He has to adjust and he’s not really adjusting.  There are people who will say, “give him time” and “don’t be so hard on him.”  To that I say, “he can have all the time he wants in the world,” I’m just not waiting around to live my life as it needs to be lived.  There is no “pause” button on my life cassette anymore.  It is play, all the way.


And that means living – honestly, openly, and with dignity.  Dignity means the person I love the most NEVER sits in the car.  She never waits outside.


That is choosing.


At one point, Gigi Chao will have to choose.  (If she hasn’t already, that is.)  It seems to me her dad may even come around.  I mean, honestly, someone who is willing to do something that outlandish has to be open-minded to a certain extent.  At the very least, he’s an innovative thinker, even if his idea is so over-the-top I’m surprised it’s not an episode of Glee.


Regardless, I’m sure of one thing…Gigi Chao is probably not going to marry a dude, not even for all the tea in China.


Yes, I just said that.  It felt good, now, didn’t it?



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Photo creds:

GigiandWIFE, feature-photo


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