Dayquil Dreams and Nyquil Hallucinations

I have a cold.  I’m not one for colds.  I don’t mean that I don’t like them.  No one likes them, I just usually don’t get them often.  But, over the last few days, I have one.  It’s a doosey and it’s left me feeling slightly like a woman slowly waking up out of a coma.  Day in and day out, I feel like I’m traveling through a not-so-unpleasant water up to my neck.  Things are heavy and my brain is groggy.

 
Yet, things have to get done.  Jokes have to be written.  Blog posts created.  Presents wrapped and things organized for a trip to the in-laws.  I feel bad for Wifesy, as I am not the typical go getter, mover and shaker of our everyday lives.  Right now I’m a slug.  I do the laundry and I have to take a nap.  I wrap a present and I have to take a nap.  I walk the dog and I have to take a nap.  The only creature this doesn’t annoy is the dog.  She looks at me as if to say, “This is how I’ve always wanted it.  Sleeeeeep, Snow White, sleeeeeeep.”

 
Normally, when I get a cold I try to forego the meds.  I’m not really a take-the-meds type of person.  But, not this time.  Feck it.  Anything to get the bug out of me.  So, I’ve been taking Dayquil pills during the day and last night, for the first time in ages, I took Nyquil to sleep…

 
And here’s what happened…

 
Within 5 minutes of taking the Nyquil, I started tripping and I mean tripping hard.  Everything was funny to me.  Wifesy started pseudo yelling at me that the jeans I had just taken to be tailored were too big.  I said, “What’s wrong with them?  Maybe I just need a belt?”

 
And she said, “They make you look like you have a d*ck.”

 
For some reason, that made me laugh so hard I nearly wet myself.

 
Bwwaahaahhhhaaaah.  Yaahahahaaaaaahaaaa.  Haaaaaahhhhhaaaaahhh.

 
I just couldn’t stop.  When I finally looked over at Wifesy she had that puzzled look on her face that I can only assume people make right before they put a loved one into an institution.

 
I gathered myself together as best as I could and slumped into bed.

 

 

nyquil buzz

 

Wifesy went around trying to pack for our trip.  However, I’m sick and her doing other things just wouldn’t do.  I’m sorry, but getting sick will turn even the most mature of adults into the biggest baby in the world.

 
I wanted attention.

 
So I started to flag Wifesy down with my arms.  “Wifesy, oh, Wifesy,” I waved my arms back and forth to no avail.  Then it occurred to me that I looked like a gynormous bird there in the bed flapping my arms about.  I flapped them even harder in an attempt to levitate.

 
Bwwwaaahhhha.  Haaahhhhhaaaaah.  Waaaaahhhhhhaaaaahhh.

 
I couldn’t stop laughing.  Wifesy would laugh a little bit and then compose herself and go back to packing.  Her ultimate goal was to ignore my antics.  I tried to enlist the dog, but she looked frightened.

 
I didn’t know where to turn.  What does the modern girl do when she doesn’t know where to turn?  She turns to the internet.

 
I googled, “Nyquil makes me loopy.”  And then “Nyquil makes me high.”  And lastly, “Can’t stop laughing on Nyquil.”

 
Eventually, it led me to this…

 
Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

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30 thoughts on “Dayquil Dreams and Nyquil Hallucinations

  1. Oh, my god. Nyquil is SO a hallucinogen. They briefly competed with Theraflu and I drank the koolaid so to speak. I had the most VIVID and realistic dreams. I’m talking birthing alien babies, vampire attacks, you name it. The kind that have you waking up thinking it really happened. I man I could FEEL the vampire bites when I was awake.

    Needless to say, I don’t take Nyquil anymore!

    1. nyquil is cray. i always have an over-the-top laughing reaction on this type of shit. when i got my wisdom teeth out, i swore the dentist said to me, “sssshhh, stop laughing.” and i said, “nooooo. why?” and he said, “because ppl think you’re crying.” and i said, “Well then SHUT THE DOOR!” then and i would swear this happened, at one point, i thought i felt something and i swear the dentist said, ‘give her a couple more ccs’ and then he whispered in my ear….”and that for you my darling, is champagne!” i mean what in the feck. i’m a total nutbag when i’m tripping out and last night i could not stop laughing. wifesy was not having it… looool. xo, sm

      1. LOL … when I got my wisdom teeth out, I ended up confessing to my mom, “This feels like getting high” Needless to say, she diabolically proceeded to interrogate me about all my activities while I was under the “influence!”

  2. OMG the video is hilarious. It that chick for real? Earlier this year I had a procedure on my neck because of a pinched nerve that was causing numbness in my left hand and my husband said as they rolled me into recovery, I was saying, “this is all going to be documented in my blog.” Of course I don’t remember saying it, but he swears I did. Evidently I also asked the neurologist if the steroids would make me grow a penis and he said, “probably not, but you never know.” I’m glad my husband didn’t make a video of it. Sorry you’re sick. Feel better Sweet Mother.

    1. ohmygod, honie. i laughed out loud at that. i love the doc’s answer ‘prob not, but you never know…’ i have no doubt that you said these things. i think it’s the creative parts of our brains that keeps working at these times. oh and that video, i think it’s very real. i would have killed my sigfig, but my god it’s funny! xoxox, sm

      1. You’re right about the creative parts of our brains, Nyquil for sure amplifies the wackadoodle side of mine. I was super sick when we got home from our big fat Italian anniversary and after a hot shower and a shot of the doodle juice, I had a dream in which Ellen DeGeneres and I were painting each others toe nails. No kidding. I wrote a post about it. Craziness!

  3. Awww. Poor Donohue. I feel so badly for you. Since I’m not under the weather (except for missing *another* apocalypse, but that’s my blog post for today), I’ll do 25 jumpinkg jacks in your honor.

    -Does one, and nearly has a heart attack-

    On second thought, I’ll eat 25 flapjacks in your honor. I hope you feel better.

  4. Ditto Shannon. Nothing interesting ever happens when I take it. I could use the help with blog ideas!

    Hope you feel better soon, though. The holidays are stressful enough without being sick on top of them!

  5. Oh, so sorry you are sick. Sick sucks, really badly. Nyquil is bad mojo, though I love it when my dearly beloved takes it, I talk to him till he knocks out he says the stupidest things that I later use against him, especially when he agrees to do things I need. You are entirely fortunate in Wifsey, she loves you enough not to take advantage. Loved the video, wonderful.

    Feel better soon!

  6. Wow, they seem to give way better drugs to those undergoing wisdom teeth extraction than tonsillectomy patients. I woke up completely coherent and slightly nauseated. Boo. Feel better. I’ve had similar experiences with Nyquil where it’s made me jumpy as shit.

  7. NyQuil is totally evil or heaven, depending on your point of view. I tend to fall into the former category while the late Jim Carroll probably enjoyed the crazy ass dreams during NyQuil-induced slumber.

  8. There was a time I had to frequently take Benadryl because I was having so many allergic reactions. Before it used to make me pass out within 30 mins. Then all of a sudden it got to a point where it’d leave me in this weird equilibrium where I was exhausted as shit but couldn’t fall asleep. I literally felt like I was on a ledge, willing myself to jump off into the oblivion of sleep, but I couldn’t. I was still hanging on by my pinky or something. It drove me nuts because I wasn’t even able to just get up and do something because I was so groggy.

    I think you should post a video of yourself on Nyquil :P It’ll be fun! ;) Feel better!!

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