Is It Only About The Hot People? (#351)

I have a true confession – I’m not a “looks” person.  It’s not to say that I don’t enjoy looking good.  I do.  My Wifesy can also attest to the fact that I own more shoes than the average bear.  I believe in looking the best that I can look, as ME, in a natural sort of way.



Don’t look at my face. Look at this classy tie instead.


Even from the time I was a child, I always enjoyed people from the inside-out more.  Let’s be clear, I’m not some saint.  Lord knows I DO see some outward appearance stuff and judge.  I am not without fault in that arena.  However, I DO lean towards who a person IS more than what they look like on the outside and I always have.


I do that less out of a feeling of morality and fairness and more out of a sense or a need for WHAT IS INTERESTING.


The insides are usually far more interesting to me.


I like to be interested.


So, why am I bringing this all up?  Here’s the bridge:


I remember, way back, a cousin of mine said to me, “I only enjoy watching hot looking people in movies.”




Her comment was an outrage for me.


I look back upon why it upset me so much and I think the answer was two-fold.  One – I was trying to make it in the entertainment industry and I KNEW I could never be one of the “hot” people.  Two – THE OVERLY HOT PEOPLE WERE USUALLY FECKIN’ BORING!!


If I have a choice between an Angelina Jolie and a Holly Hunter or a Judi Dench, well, I’m going Judi Dench because she is interesting as feck.  Dench could make reading the phone book look interesting.  If the movie stars Brad Pitt alongside William Macy and Robert Duvall – my eyes are on Duvall and Macy.  Okay, if Pitt takes his shirt off, I’m still looking.  I have eyes after all.  But, I’m talking about the craft here.


When I watch a movie or a tv show I want to escape.  So, for me, I like the changeling actor.  I like the actor that can dissolve so much into a character so entirely that you forget who they were before.  They are nothing, but what you see before you.  THAT is what I enjoy watching.


But, am I alone?  Does the rest of the world only revel in the beautiful people?


Hollywood says yes, that’s what the public likes.  The mere fact that Kathy Bates had to fight (in court) for a role that she played on the stage for years when it was re-cast in favor of a beautiful person for filming purposes, well, when that happens I’d say the case is made and the verdict is in – PRETTY PEOPLE RULE.


Yet, my tastes hold true.  I like the regular people.  The odd ones.  The average Joe on the outside with the swirling inner life about to explode right out of his chest.


I like to watch people that are RELATABLE.


Recently, I read this slightly disturbing article that says Youtube is going the same way.  (Click here to read.)  Youtube is now the online den of the beautiful people.  They are the ones that rise to popularity based somewhat on content, but mostly on beauty and youth.  It depresses me.  I want my regular-looking, cyclones of the interesting.  And especially on Youtube.  After all, Youtube is supposed to be entertainment made democratic.  But, is it?  Really?


cute girl

I’m cute, young, pretty, and I might even be ethnic. Where’s my feckin’ youtube channel?


Perhaps, it truly is just another vehicle where our drone-like natures will default to staring at the beautiful people and wishing we were something more.  Wishing we were them.


Maybe blogs and the written word are TRULY the last places where you can appreciate someone for their utterly interesting insides.  I don’t know.  What do you think?



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Photo credits:

cute-girl, tie-man, red-carpet


49 thoughts on “Is It Only About The Hot People? (#351)

  1. Isn’t it just the best when you watch a movie from, say, the 70s and everyone looks like a person? Walter Matthau is the cop on the case? Hell yes! Margot Kidder is Lois Lane? Love it!

      1. Right??? With both of you and that, and on this whole post. Looks fade. What you have on the inside stays with you forever.

    1. And they don’t all have blinding smiles, “perfect” teeth. Could not agree more, with all of this Mom… and Byronic. Personally, I’ve always found beauty in a-symetry, whether that be in design or people. It’s the differences that make us attractive, for my 2 cents worth.

  2. We call that the 90210-zation of the world in my house. Personally, I hate it.

    I like interesting people too. I’ll take Clint Eastwood or Charles Bronson over Brad Pitt any day.

    Sadly, it’s a scientific fact that the symmetry of beautiful people (it’s the symmetry of their features that makes them appealing) is biologically appealing. We’re drawn whether we want to be or not. I don’t think we need to succumb to rote biology though.


    Best wishes, Momma.

    1. great point all around, elene. the biology of it IS interesting, but agreed. we don’t have to succumb to pure instinct these days. we’ve got brains too. at least some of us do. lool. thank you for reading. i really appreciate it. xo, sm

  3. As a photographer, I am definitely drawn towards what my brain sees as beauty – but for me I’d rather photography my 100 year old neighbor – those creases on her face show so much more life that the airbrushed magazine cover girls. I think beauty is more interesting when you have to look for it.

  4. i agree, the generic ‘beautiful’ look tends to be boring, while easy on the eyes, no challenge, and easily forgotten. in contrast, the most unusual and individual sort of beauty, while it may be harder to define and to recognize, is much more interesting, leaves a much greater impression on you, and impacts you on a whole other level.

    1. welp, i hope so. but, i do wonder if all of us here are the exception to the rule and the rest of the masses think beauty above all. regardless, who cares – i’ll take my interesting over my high gloss, any day. xo, sm

  5. Well, I am hot as sh*t and I don’t have a YouTube channel. Hahahaha. I am kidding. I have a YouTube channel. Kidding again. No YouTube channel plus not very hot anymore. LOL.

  6. I like watching Brittish t.v. shows because people look like human beings and not like models running around. Much less make up for everyday wear. They look real.

    I admit to getting very tired of movies and t.v. shows where the homely, overweight, leading actors always get the hot, sexy models. They never make movies and hire a larger actress in a leading part with a hot, hunky man. But in real life, I’ve seem more hot, muscled, men with plump or heavy girl friends or wives than I do frumpy men with sexy girlfriends.

    Hollywood objects to realism.

    1. i could NOT agree with you more on the homely dudes, hot girl scenarios. it is SO tired. and happens all the time. especially with male comedian leads in tv shows. thank god there are the melissa mccarthys of the world, but then again they gave her a fatter leading man – so your point holds. as for the british tv, i’m trying to think about when i lived there and you are probably right on that tip. the only trouble with brit tv is that there is not enough of it. and their seasons are too short. i’m always left wanting more. i’ve seen every prime suspect, cracker, and vicar of dibley that there is. seriously. much love, urban, much love. sm

  7. I have the exact opposite problem as your cousin- I have a really hard time enjoying a movie when everyone is hot. Me in a movie theater: “Oh, really? She woke up with dewy skin and perfectly curled hair? Didn’t they get drunk and have a one night stand? If that was real life she’d look like a clown who was smothered in a pillow, trying not to barf as she searches for her shoes.”

    1. hilarious once again, j and t. and i hear you. i’m always hoping they would all just look a little more real. it’s why i’ve always liked actresses like edie falco and others like that. sigh tho. i fear we may be in the minority. but, feck ’em feck ’em feck ’em. xoxox, sm

  8. Bad news, Rebecca (or is it?): You’re beautiful. I’ve seen your sets, and your glamour shots. 😉 You are very easy on the eyes. You’re also funny as hell & brilliant, so I’d say you’re the total package.

    1. YOU are too kind to me. But, i am still a lady so i’m going to say thank you – though i want to refute everything you’ve just said like some kind of blushing teenager, i’m not going to. i’m just going to say thank you. and that you are very kind. much love, sm

      1. You’re welcome.

        However, I am not a getleman, so I will refute one of your words: Kind. I’m not kind. I’m stating the what’s so.

        You’re an epic lady, funny (obviously), intelligent and a great friend. That makes you beautiful in my book. The exceptional outer part of you is icing on the cake.

  9. I’m with Urbannight on this one. British productions always seem more real and interesting because the actors seem more real and relatable. I also agree with TheAuthorRWFoster on his assessment of you Rebecca.
    Lest you think I am all too agreeable today I have to admit to not agreeing about Angelina Jolie. She is a spectacularly beautiful woman on the outside, no argument, but I have admired her since I first saw her as a matted, snotty mess in “Girl Interrupted”. Then I simply said, “who is that mess? I love her”. I believe over the years she has proven her talent and that she can be a real…asshole (circa: Bill Bob), but, today her piece in the NY Times about her double mastectomy proves to me that she is truly about much more than her appearance.

  10. I guess I’m not like most of America. I think Brad Pitt is eh. George Clooney has boring face. And those 400 male actors all with the last name “Hemsworth” are just pffttt. I would watch Martin Short in any goddamn medium. I love Steve Martin. And Stephen Colbert.

  11. What do I think? I think you’d love me! I have lots of shoes and I’m inflatable. Oh. You said “RELATABLE”. Never mind. But you also said, “The insides are usually far more interesting to me.” You can tell by looking at my torso that there’s a whole lot of interesting in there. And my face is definitely a conversation piece too. One of my favorite actors is Linda Hunt. I’ve loved her since The year of Living Dangerously and am so happy she has a great part in N.C.I.S.LA. Don’t get me wrong, I have a long list of hot actresses I’d like to meet.(and some actors, too). But alas, Michelle keeps me on a short leash, And if I had my choice of working on any TV show I wanted, I’d love to play Dan Conner to your Roseanne. You could even be younger and gayer if you like. Hope the job is going well so you never have to think about our TV show again.

  12. It’s so funny that you bring up the thing about YouTube and how it’s supposed to be the most democratic media outlet, yet the pretty people get top billing. The other day I was at a cafe and someone had left a magazine out of the table. On the cover was a beautiful, well-dressed young woman who was the focus of a story about how her charity work is making strides. I couldn’t help but wonder if the publication would have chosen to photograph her for the cover if she wasn’t so attractive.

  13. Because of the dominant pretty people culture, we gotta really dig for the good stuff. Maybe that makes the good, interesting stuff all the more better??

  14. I totally agree that movies are dominated by the pretty (and often vapid) people. But are those the ones who are really excelling at the craft? Think about who is regularly in the hunt and/or wins best actor/actress: Daniel Day-Lewis, Phillip Seymour-Hoffman, Jeff Bridges, Colin Firth, Helen Mirren, Meryl Streep, Viola Davis, and Glenn Close. While they are all still very attractive and certainly the exception to the rule, it at least gives me hope that, on some level, merit will prevail. Or maybe its because, if you aren’t young and classically pretty, then you just have to work your ass off to be extraordinarily brilliant in order to get a role. In that case, ugh all over again.

    That said, I will watch anything that has Channing Tatum in it. Sad but true.

  15. I like hot people, too, except my idea of what makes someone hot is that their beauty is first and foremost not conventional. I’m a big believer in that cliche that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The media has little sway over me. The women I’m most attracted to would probably not meet your cousin’s seal of approval. I find most actresses on TV and in film far too thin and most celebrities, whatever the gender, too generic and dull. I much prefer who I’m sitting next to while watching whatever is on screen to anyone performing on that show or in that film. Looks aside, if the person has no substance, that’s a deal breaker. I’ll quickly lose interest. To me, substance can make someone that might seem invisible look like a superstar. My time is valuable. I’m not going to waste it tuning in to yet another bland pretty young thing on YouTube.

  16. Gah, I don’t think any of us are immune to beautiful people, but I swear I married my ex because we discussed philosophy and computing on our first date… not because he was drop dead gorgeous, which he was. I suspect our fascination for, and envy of, the beautiful people is hardwired, like preferring sugar to salt. But you’d think as we become adults we would learn to prefer a tender steak with all the good stuff to a mock cream cake?

  17. I bet I can beat you in the shoe department. But to your question, I suspect we are as human beings always going to look at beautiful, it it hard wired into us. The question is, will it hold our attention for long if there is nothing proping it up, no heart, intellect or common values to keep us interested. Then we have the issue of how is beauty defined, who gets to define it and on what basis.

    If I made a list of all those who I find beautiful, who over the years I would have allowed to eat crakers in my bed they would all have several things in common. Intellect, humor, great smiles, a bit of the devil in the twinkle in their eye, passion and compassion, great voices, empathy, honor, a sense of play and wonder. They might not all have been classically beautiful. They might not all have been ‘perfect’. They would have all though have had substance.

  18. Most of so called beautiful people in Hollywood are not really that beautiful – they are perfectly made to look good (good or almost pretty – not beautiful): hairdo, makeup, surgeries, proper lightning, etc. Many of those ‘beauties’ are also children of famous and influential people – with very few exceptions here.

    Have you ever noticed that anyone who enters the list of the 50 most beautiful people in the world, etc. first becomes a millionaire (regardless the looks) and then is accepted on the list? 🙂

    Many cute people are cute only because they are young and withing few years they lose all the cuteness and charm – to sum it up – I think that people like what’s authentic, genuine and kind in others – looks is important, true – but in right proportions.

  19. I like reading blogs for this reason too – you often have no idea what the writer looks like (do I look like that little round tarte tatin in my pic? 😀 ) which means its the writing alone that determines whether its interesting.

  20. I love interesting people – and I think they are hot – even if others do not- the insides make the outsides hot. I do have to say Johnny Depp is hotter than hot -but he’s also inclined to take roles that are not about the ‘beautiful person’ – like Hunter S Thompson – and it makes me respect him a whole lot more than say, a Tom Cruise person (whom I loathe – even before it was cool to loathe him).

  21. Like it or not, looks are a bulk of your first impression. By that I don’t mean people under 8 on the 1-10 scale aren’t worth a damn. What I mean is that we should be the best representative of ourselves. Dressing well, grooming oneself, being generally cultured are good things.
    Having said that, what you look like is only the first few minutes of any interaction. After that, it’s what you say and what you do. So while there will always be people who don’t like seeing average lookers on screen, a lot of the most celebrated actors aren’t conventional hotties. So the audience is clearly capable putting substance over style.

  22. This is why I enjoy watching British TV so much—they still have actors who look like actual people. They aren’t stick figures, they haven’t been botoxed to death, they aren’t uber-prettified. They’re just people. Hollywood types are just so off-the-charts fake looking that I find them unsavory. Wrinkles, facial expression, a few extra pounds, scars, etc, all go a long way in sexing it up. Hollywood hasn’t figured that out yet.

  23. Well, I don’t think Hollywood’s especially concerned about what truly matters in life. They are only producing what they think we all want to watch. It’s like a business strategy and hopefully people won’t take it to heart and instill those kinds of values, for example: “it’s only about the hot people”, into their own family or individual values. We ‘regular’ people should really know better and be more discerning. Great post! You have a fantastic, independent mind!

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