“Have you tipped their ears?” she asked.
“No, I haven’t,” answered Wifesy.
It was all via text message, but I could still hear the huff in her 142 characters.
“I’d like to sit in your backyard over night with the trap, if that’s alright,” she added ignoring Wifesy’s last comment.
I took the phone from Wifesy and answered myself this time.
“How will you see?”
“I wear night vision goggles and camo.” she stated without adding any emoticons to indicate jest or sarcasm.
“Holy feck,” I murmured to Wifesy.
It seems we have partnered with the Crazy Cat Lady Alliance. You see, Wifesy is an animal lover. She goes to great lengths to care for her animals. She’ll administer extreme treatments, if she’s capable, in order to keep a loved and furry one alive. But, she still treats them like animals. She hasn’t formed any kind of club or society. If myself and the dog were drowning in the ocean I’m pretty sure who she would save first. Although, I’d probably go after the dog while Wifesy tried to save me. So, in my mind I like to think we’d all come out alive.
Crazy Cat Lady Alliance, on the other hand, would save the cat. Of this, I have no doubt. I have no idea why that cat would be in the ocean next to me, drowning. Maybe Noah’s Ark 2 capsized? Regardless, cat lady would save the cat. I know this because she has formed her own one-woman militia to save the neighborhood’s feral felines. She dons a uniform. She fights a war on the daily. She needs a rap song with a good hook sung by a pretty girl who sh*ts melodies. It’s that serious.
Feck with the cats, you feck with me!
I have a great love for human characters like Crazy Cat Lady Alliance. If her persona were in a movie it would be played by Frances McDormand or William H. Macy. It’s riveting to watch souls like that navigate through the world – ultra sensitive, ultra dedicated, and maybe even uber damaged. Yet, I don’t want to be married to them. Wifesy is the perfect mix of just a little crazy, just a little sane. Feck with that mix and you have something else entirely. I like to think I’m the same way too.
These days it feels as if my life is spinning by me at warp speed, while I desperately try to hold on. So, I love watching these new and interesting characters as they slip in and out of my field of vision. There’s the barefoot family from Wisconsin to my left and the Mexican Shanty Town to my right. But, you’ll have to hear about those at another time.
I’m keeping this one short and sweet, so I can troll around and catch up on some of my favorite blogs. Until next time…
Love,
Sweet Mother
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For more Sweet Mother, hit the extensive archives section.
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Photo credits:
cat-lady-black-and-white, cat-relaxing, battle-woman
Tagged: animal lover, battle, Cat, cat lady, comedy, crazy cat lady, essays, Frances McDormand, funny, humor, humour, inspiration, lgbt, life, lifestyle, neighborhood, neighbors, night vision goggles, Pet, rap song, stories, Sweet Mother, town, war, William H. Macy
Hey! Nice to read you.
Well, we all know He-Who wouldn’t bother to rescue me or whatever pet was drowning beside me. He sit on shore laughing his head off thinking we were both having a great time. (This is me shaking my head still, every time I think about it).
I look forward to hearing about the barefoot family from Wisconsin to your left and the Mexican Shanty Town to your right.
lmao. and that may just be the title of the pice, “wisconsin to my left, mexican shanty town to my right’! lol. so nice to hear from you, mg. i’ll be by to check out your blogs (urs and he-whos) very shortly. xo, sm
“These days it feels as if my life is spinning by me at warp speed”—I swear it feels more and more like that every year I get older. I suppose it has to do with all the multi-media in our lives. Maybe we just don’t take enough time to unwind anymore?
Nice to see a post from you. Looking forward to hearing about the barefoot family from Wisconsin. :)
indeed, rubes, indeed. slowing down at the current moment has become an imperative. as for the wisconsin post, it’s definitely coming. ;)
I’ve MISSED
oops… hit the wrong key. Let’s try that again. I’ve missed YOU! Seeing your post is a lovely way to start a Monday morning, plus it made me laugh. I’m not quite Crazy Cat Lady but in another decade or so I could be. ;) Vive le Chat… et le Chien.
-hugs-
oh, meeks. it’s so good to cyber see you too. hopefully, i can get one post per week out – more or less. hope you are well and thriving and you can come by to care for these cats at any time. ;) sm
-hugs- our lives are going in parallel a bit. I’m doing a new course in order to get a job, so real life is pushing in more than it did. I hope things are starting to balance themselves out for you, and that you’re enjoying the process. Would love to visit once a week if you can manage it. :)
I hate cats. I really, really do. But I miss the feral ones who kept the vermin out of my yard. Also, got the Fargo reference there. Lovin’ that!
feral kittens.we’ve got a yard of ‘em. it’s cray. they are cute now, but momma needs ‘em out of here before they become cats. and the dogs eat the cat poo. GROSSSSSSS! not kidding, it’s like caviar to them!
That is so gross! I had a dog who loved to eat my sister’s horse’s poop when it was frozen. Dogs are disgusting creatures, albeit cute and loveable. There isn’t much redeeming about cats, though.
That’s a great mix to have. I for one nearly start crying every time I come across a poor squirrel who didn’t make it across the road. Bleeding heart I guess. Protect those pussy cats!
there should be more people like you then. ;) sm
Aww, thanks hun!
Welcome back – far too much of this warp speed business going on! I want to hear how the Cat Alliance lady fairs in the end. Does she in fact snare her prey or will she slink away slowly in the cold daen light, empty handed and empty caged…
or does she fare? Damn it, now my English is going …
she has captured and released nearly all of them! minus the mother who is always getting preggers. she’s the town sl*t I tell you. poor thing that she is. i seriously don’t know how this woman does it taking care of the neighborhod cats as she does and working a job and wearing camo… ;0 xo, sm
Wait, she wears camo at her other job as well. I tip my hat to her as well :)
Haha! Really enjoyed this post Mama. I think I am perhaps like wifesy – a little bit crazy and a little bit sane. I go completely Erica Kane if anyone dares to mess with my four-legged ones. :-)
Gedlab.com – A blog for the modern man
ged! so good to cyber see you. and i love any man who makes an erica kane reference!! lol. thanks for leaving that link too – i’ll be checking out that blog. xo, sm
cute, funny, warm, and pithy. maybe cat ladies are magic. maybe they only find themselves that situation when they want to, and maybe in those instances, the cat is always the right choice. sad is the cat lady who can save neither. but she’ll keep trying to get it right… starting with cats.
beautiful comment, elysia and accurate on so many levels. thanks for leaving it here. you almost make me want to raise a glass and cheer, “to the cat ladies!” lol. much love, sm
Yes! She is alive! I was a little worried there, Rebecca! I’ve missed you and reading your words. Hope everything is going good for you two.
How did CCA get that name? I figure she’s a crazy cat lady, but where does the “Alliance” come in?
in the beginning, there was more than one of her. but, now she’s become this one woman army. so, i suppose that’s why i chose alliance and to try and disguise her non-profit group’s very similar name. lol. i am well and alive. though i have to say i have never been busier in my life. can’t wait until it all slows down a bit. good to see you, robert. as it always is. xo, sm
I believe all pets should be kept safely away from the ocean. No need to risk it. In my old neighborhood there is a vet who is the go-to guy for the feral cat colony managers. I think it takes a special kind of crazy to volunteer to care for them. I’m just not that kind of crazy. God bless ‘em.
“i’m just not that kind of crazy.” oh, artsy, you spoke my language there! lol. i’m many crazies, but that ain’t one of ‘em. so nice to see you here. i look forward to checking out your photos again. xo, sm
I have ‘Stuck In The Middle’ stuck in my head now. Well done, sm! I look forward to reading about the Wisconsin barefooters and their shanty-town bretheren.
As always, I miss you so it is such a pleasure to see you pop up. Glad your house has released you for a quick few minutes to the blogosphere. I adore cats, live with two of them. When I lived in Singapore we were surrounded by feral cats, they were everywhere all over the streets. I think they were protected, not sure. Your crazy cat lady? Well, she is special I think I might like her. Other neighbors? Can’t wait to hear about them. Aren’t neighbors interesting?