I’m up way too early today. It’s a cold, California, early morning. I’m finally feeling like I’m back to a place where I can write, consistently, again and that feels good. That’s the state of my inner, inner world. It’s getting more balanced. Yet, the outer world is a strange place. It seems out of whack. I just threw some tweets up on twitter and noticed that #MandelaMemorial and Tila Tequila were trending at the same time.
How in the feck are Tila Tequila and Nelson Mandela on the same score board EVER?
An astute tweeter said, “Yeah…AND??! Is this the first time you’ve looked at twitter trends?”
Of course I get it. There are always two ridiculous things trending at the same time. A president and a lubricant. A non-celebrity pushing his reality show, next to a cutie in a bat suit taking over San Francisco as part of his, “make a wish”. I totes get it.
Yet, I can’t help feeling sometimes like I’m straddling two worlds. Maybe it’s my age. Maybe it’s something else.
The other day I had this conversation.
Me: (defiantly walking up to my across-the-street neighbor in a pink hoodie) “Uh, pal, can you turn that music down? It’s 8am on a Saturday and I can hear it in my bedroom.”
Neighbor: “No, it’s my Saturday too and I want to listen to my music as loud as it will go. It helps me to avoid my feelings.”
Me: “Look, you’re not the only one that lives on this block.”
Neighbor: “Neither are you.”
Me: “Your music offends me.”
Neighbor: “Your weight offends me.”
Okay, so that didn’t really happen. What really happened was I asked the guy to turn down the music and he said, “Okay.” However, those are the fights that happen in my head.
Dude, I find your car stereo aggressive.
I can’t help, but feeling like the Wifesy and I have – to an extent – become THOSE people. Those annoying elderly people that police the neighborhood and who don’t understand that Tila Tequila and Mandela could trend at the same time.
The only other people who I know like that are my parents. They are wonderful, elderly, folks who are stuck in a magical time machine where a t-shirt only costs $5. Forget explaining twitter to them. The other day I asked my mother to Fedex something and she asked me if she should bring her own glue stick to affix the label. Dear.God!
Oh well, at least there’s the bitching, writing. That I can always rely on.
Until next time.
***
Funny videos of me annoying my dogs.
Sweet Mother 
So great to hear from you! If we were neighours I would totally let you come over and yell at me to turn my music down. Hand me the script. I will play.
On another note I now have to find out what Tila Tequila is.
tequila is great if you’re drinking it. tila tequila gives you a headache by listening to her. that, in a nutshell, is it. nice to read you, mg. 😉 sm
I’m so glad I’m not the only one who has those only in my head fights. You’re not alone! In a coffee shop recently, during the all too painful government shutdown, I was treated to a heated discussion about the casting of Ben Affleck as the new batman. I had hoped that the conversation was between a few pubescent high school boys, but alas. Non. Fully grown adults, these were. I shuddered.
Ha! I’ve had times when I played out arguments in my head, and then when the confrontation actually comes, it goes down without any sort of disagreement. Don’t you feel kind of disappointed? It’s like you built up all that ammunition for nothing.
Hey, haven’t seen much in the way of your musings of late. Thanks for the insight into your head. I like it. I turn the speed limit in 6 months. Of course I’ve been “that guy” since my son (who’s 21 and driving home from Crackerland–U of South Carolina–today) was old enough to (hopefully) learn object lessons when cretins were pointed out to him on the streets of suburban NJ. Not all the lessons stuck, but at least we avoided ink and the various holes in his bodies have closed nicely.
Glad I’m not the only one that has fights in my head that go down radically differently. My “head fights” usually end up with someone being dismembered by a giant tentacle beast from the darkest regions of space, though. But the same idea, right?
Welcome back! I’ve missed you!
Had to Google Tila Tequila to figure out who she is… and now I’m a little upset about humankind. I am right there in the “What Is Wrong With All Y’all” boat with you 🙂
The influence to “become” our parents is certainly strong and I think that we only become aware of it as we grow older. At that point we can choose to go in a different direction with it, or fall into the tried-and-true family pattern.
More and more I do find myself watching some talking head/celebrity and wondering “who is this and why should I care?”. I take it as a chance for personal growth and listen in for some pearl of insight.
It’s great to hear from you again and this is a good topic.
Allan
Just take a Seldane. That should cure your angst…
[I realized yesterday that after I pulled off my boots with an audible grunt (as if I’d just hefted a 300-pound dumbbell), I am officially old.]
Kinda scary, isn’t it? I was doing something the other day, stopped and realized that I’m becoming my dad. 🙂
It’s even worse when you realize the behavior that bothers you is the same thing you did at that age. 🙂 Yep, hubs and I are “those people,” too, sometimes. Sigh.
I feel a twinge of that old, cranky person waking up inside me. This is also the person who can’t wait to move out of an apartment in a college town and get a house to have some FRICKIN PEACE AND QUIET.
Now get off my lawn.
lmao – was just saying to the Daughter yesterday that the one good thing about getting old[er] is the weird sense of empowerment. Twenty years ago I’d fume quietly at home while the music blared. These days I’d be in your face. Don’t know how it works for men but for me, becoming the invisible woman has brought some liberation along with the wrinkles.
So glad life is settling down. Hope to see more of you. -hugs-
Hey! Great to see you back! I actually just took a “mental age” test today and scored at 45 years old. I’ll be 32 in a month. What the what!
I have completely missed you. Good now that is out of the way. I don’t want to sound whiney or anything, but I feel deserted.
I totally get those dialogs in your head (there is medication for that). I live in what is supposed to be a gated community. I think they forgot the gates, they let teenagers in and they have those thumpers in their cars (oh, never mind they let their parents in).
I am constantly running outside and screaming at them as they drive by cars thumping and bouncing, my walker waving in the air. Oh wait that is my inner fantasy.
My mother chased swans and geese with a rope whip my dad gave her case the sh*t on the dock. That will be me but I will chase teenagers and other nefarious neighbors.
Can I say that I’m overjoyed to see you back here? Can I say that I’d be joyful to see you reading our blogs again. Can I just say: I miss you!! As for those people, I am so far ahead of you… it should be trending. That makes us both trendY. 😉
Maybe I’ve been living under a rock, but I had made it through many years without hearing of Tila Tequila. Glad you’re posting again.
Glad I held on to this email notification. hahaha I’m glad I’m not the only one who has imaginary fights in my head and then nothing happens. I was getting really frustrated for you. I’m older than you and I’ve hit the point where I’m thinking “downsizing”? Yes, why Pa and I don’t need this much space soon the kids’ll be gone and I’ll just be puttering around with my geraniums.
I’ve been telling people I’m 50 for almost a year. I turn 50 in 2015. I’m ready.
catching up with old posts now Sweet Mom …missed few posts..i’ve guess been absent for too long…Merry Christmas to you and Wifesy 🙂 Happy Holidays
If the neighbor with the loud stereo is actually the guy with the ridiculous, I am moving to your block. Especially since I would have someone else to police the neighbors for me.
and police them i do. 😉 the stereo is somewhat better now, but if it gets bad again I’m going out with my ‘badge’, which is actually a shortbread cookie. sssshhhh, don’t tell anyone.
I don’t even know who Tila Tequila. I had a Twitter account, twice, for about 5 mins. I don’t ‘get’ it and I don’t care if I ever do. I also have those kinds of conversations in my head all the time. People call me a prude. I’m happy so I just smile and say “Thank you”…. Which totally confuses them.. Win-win.
hahahahah, i understand you, arkansarose. and i’m glad you commented here. much love, sm