It occurs to me that people LOVE reading a list on the internet. There’s something about the size and efficiency of it that is perfect for online reading. That being the case I’d like to throw my list-hat into the ring. Oh, but what to list? Well, if I were to be truthful about myself I’d say I’m a misanthropic, people person. Yes, it is possible. There are days when I love people so much that I am bathed in this glow of we-are-all-oneness then there are other days when the only other person I can stand is Wifesy. On those days, I barely leave the house. So, here is my list…
Types of People I Like, Types of People I Dislike:
Like: People who hold the door
This is a big idea in a small gesture. It says, “I see you. My day is not so important that I can’t stop for one second and help you out or just nod a hello.” I remember one particular time I was at a restaurant I really liked with a friend I liked. As we left, a nice, older, gentleman in a light colored khaki suit went out of his way to hold the door for us. I smiled and said thank you because it made me feel good. My friends said something else entirely, which leads to my next item…
Dislike: People Who Let Their Political Beliefs Get in the Way of Niceness
My friend actually reprimanded this nice guy who held the door for us. She said something to the effect of, “We may be women, but we can get our own door, thank you very much.” In fact, it wasn’t even that gently put. It was rude and it was embarrassing. I mean for god’s sake, he was just being nice! Let a man be nice or a woman be nice because a lot of woman hold doors too and that sort of kills your defensive feminist tirade. I like feminists. I am one, but I don’t like a feminist that doesn’t allow a door to be held every once in a while, I mean give me a break.
Like: Cancer Survivors
There is something about having your regular life taken to the brink and then brought back that makes people extraordinary. I find that cancer survivors really do see the beauty in every moment of every day, the way we’re all supposed to, but don’t. They are walking, beautiful reminders of one simple fact – time is running out for all of us.
There are people who actually believe that your “mind-state” can lead to your cancer. They also believe your thoughts can cure your cancer. They seem to suggest that cancer patients have somehow brought their cancer upon themselves by thinking “bad” thoughts. Their arguments seem to say, “If you were a nicer person with better chakras and cooler energy then you wouldn’t have this little cancer problem.” Really? Then what about children with cancer, you numbskull. Are you trying to tell me that little kids and babies somehow brought their cancer upon themselves? No, of course they didn’t. Because cancer is just simply one of those horrors that we as human beings are not evolved enough to understand or explain. It’s no one’s fault. Let’s just leave it at that.
Like: Realists Who Are Dreamers
Maybe it’s my comedy background, but I like a realist. I like a person who sees things as they are. That doesn’t mean they don’t dream. This type of realist dreams and dreams and imagines, but he sees the world as it is. From that starting point, he dreams. That’s how he accomplishes by staring at reality and finishing at amazing. To me, that’s how space flight happened.
Dislike: Conspiracy Theorists
There are people who actually believe that we never landed on the moon and that 9-11 was an inside job. Some of these people actually live in homes, are well dressed, and appear to be normal contributors to society. Some of them are French. I say this because when I think “conspiracy theorist”, I think of someone dressed like the unabomber, someone who specializes in hobo-chic. But, no, some of these people look normal. So, I can only surmise that your brain looks like the unabombers home – all disorganized and chaotic with a hint of crazy oozing out of the corners. This shit happened. We know how it happened. It’s obvious. Please spend less time believing in ghosts and more time learning a foreign language. PLEASE.
I really dislike hackers. I picture them as loners who live in their parents’ house and use their smart brains for nothing aside from f*cking shit up. What losers. Use your brain for something good. Oh, you’re so great. You stopped a website from functioning and f*cked up the lives of a lot of people. You posted your jpeg message on another site showing the world that your message really makes no sense and that you really stand for nothing – nothing except chaos. These hacker-types exist everywhere. They aren’t just silent hackers. They’re bloggers and vloggers and podcasters and tweeters. They use the beautiful connectivity of the internet to destroy, provoke, prod, or maim. It is the very definition of lame. Me, NO LIKEY.
I read a quote somewhere that said, “there are hackers and there are crackers. Hackers destroy and crackers create.” So, crackers are the creators in cyberspace. They use their brains for good. They use their heads to push their big ideas through a very democratized internet. They make you think. They make you feel good. They don’t spend their time criticizing, instead they spend it hypothesizing. I have a favorite quote about critics. It goes like this, “A critic is someone who arrives on the battlefield after the battle is done and shoots the wounded.” That is a hacker. I’d say a cracker is someone who picks up the wounded, tends to their injuries, and then helps them continue to fight.
There’s my list for the day. I could go on, but I want you to have a light read. A cliff-notes version of my blog for once. I also wanted to end on a “like”. When I used to play, “he loves me” / “he loves me not” by plucking flower petals, whenever I ended on a “he loves me not” – I started again. That’s just who I am. I like people who are like that. Thanks for reading.