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Re-Directing the Energy of 40,000 Twats

So, I tend not to be too political on this blog.  Mainly, because I’m just not a political writer/ comedian.  I prefer a “can’t we all just get along” approach most of the time.  However, today I’m going to speak out.  I’m speaking out against One Million Moms.  Actually, speaking out is not even the best way to say it.  I’d like to re-direct their energy altogether.

 

If you don’t know – One Million Moms are an anti-gay, hate group.  That is not a biased opinion.  The whole reason they exist is to combat the ‘homosexual agenda’.  (BTW, where in the feck is this homosexual agenda?!  I have been scouring libraries all over the country for my copy because I’d like to prominently display it in my home in a gorgeous gold, lame, frame so people can read it when they come to my salon for tea and wine parties.)

 

Gratuitous Gay Image #1

Gratuitous Gay Image #2

 

The One Million Moms are an offshoot of a group called, “The American Family Association”.  The American Family Association was originally called, “The National Federation for Decency” – I can only assume the National Federation for Decency was a sister organization to the Justice League originally run by the defiant team of Superman and Aquaman.  I can only assume this because the name of the group and its many incarnations can only be seen as fantastical.  Their names seem fairy-tale-like and, as such, I tend to see them as cartoons created by some conservative’s deranged imagination.

 

Gratuitous Gay Image #4

Now, I’m all for free speech.  I believe in that amendment even more than some of the others.  How does the saying go, “I hate what you say, but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it…”  I understand that.  I abide by that.  However, I’d have far more respect for these hateful groups if they stopped co-opting words like American, Family, and Decency.  Just say what you mean, which is more like – Totalitarian, Tyrannical, Cultish, My Way or the Highway, and plain and simple – ANTI-GAY.

 

So, One Million Moms is this group of supposed moms.  They call themselves One Million Moms even though there are only 40,000 “moms” in the group.  I suppose this is wishful thinking?  If this tact is working for them, then maybe I should change the name of this blog from Sweet Mother to ONE MILLION HITS PER DAY because that’s what I want.  Is it possible to wish your membership growth by way of your group naming?  I suppose it’s similar to that basketball player who changed his name to Meta World Peace.  I can only suppose that’s what he’s going for with such a retarded name.  I want world peace, so I’m going to change my name to World Peace.  Along these lines of thinking, I should definitely head down to city hall and change my name to FAMOUS WRITER B. RICH.

 

Gratuitous Gay Image #5

Gratuitous Gay Image #6

 

If you don’t know, the One Million Moms or as I prefer to call them by their reality – The 40,000 Twats – have run such wonderful campaigns as the semi-recent boycott of JCPenny when they decided to hire Ellen Degeneres as their spokesperson.  She’s a lesbo.  They don’t approve of lesbos, so therefore people should stop buying sh*t from JCPennys.  Of course, their boycott failed because boycotting Ellen DeGeneres is like boycotting the comedy-baby-Jesus.  (She’s funny and kind and “does no harm”, just as I imagine comedy-baby-Jesus to be…)  Then there was the whimsical 40,000 Twats campaign where they boycotted Ben and Jerry’s for issuing a flavor called, “Schweddy Balls”.  I’m not kidding.  (And they say lesbians are humorless.)  And this month, they’ve decided to boycott Urban Outfitters for featuring a lesbian kiss in its catalog.

 

Wow, so offensive. I mean, it even looks like they love each other.

 

As some of you may know from following me, it has been my desire, since the blog was conceived (by a lesbo mind you), to have Sweet Mother boycotted by an anti-gay hate group.  I have thrown down the gauntlet to the Westboro Baptist Church here and now I would like to offer the challenge to the 40,000 Twats.  Please, please, please, boycott me.  I beg of you.  I have put as many gratuitous lesbian and gay images throughout this post in an effort to bait you.  I’m hoping this post, in particular, explodes with so much gay that you will be forced to come this way.  It will be a beautiful day when I can tell even 1 of you 40,000 twats what I really think of you.

 

Does this help?

How about this?

 

Now, supposedly these twats are also moms.  As you all know, I revere moms.  So, I say, that if these particular twats refuse to boycott me then they should re-direct their twatish energy towards more needy causes than banning slutty t-shirts and kicking the comedy-baby-Jesus (read: Ellen).

 

I think all of the below issues are more important.  They are in need of more support than the current campaigns of the amazing 40,000 twats.  I’d like the Head-Twat to please review these new suggestions and leave the rest of us the feck alone.  Thank you.  Here goes.

 

New Places for the 40,000 Twats to Put Their Energy:

 

  • Forming a new organization called, “40,000 Twats for the Protection of sub-Saharan Clits.”  The premise is simple.  We are twats.  Therefore, we vow to protect the twats of other ladies who can not protect themselves.  We hereby vow to help every sub-Saharan lady grow up to full adulthood with fully intact lady parts.  Simple.  It’s a twat for twat program like Tom’s Shoes.

 

  • 40,000 Twat Moms Boycott Toddlers and Tiaras.  We are twat-moms.  We know exploitation of children when we see it.  We want it stopped, therefore we are boycotting all baby pageants and the wack-a-loons who pursue them and the networks that televise them.

 

  • 40,000 Twat Moms and the Citizen Baby Monitors Against Bullying Campaign.  You know those citizen watch programs in local communities created to keep the locals safer?  You know, the good programs, not those cowboy initiatives taken on by gun-toting loons like Zimmerman, but the Guardian Angel kind, the kinds that really work?  We, at 40,000 Twat Moms, are going to start one where we monitor playgrounds and classrooms and hallways using baby monitors and Nanny cams.  (We’re also going to start a network of cyber-forensic civilian patrols that can monitor any bullying done online.)  Bullying has become a huge problem and we’re losing a generation of talented youth to needless suicides.  We’re going to save one child at a time by exposing bullies and even more important the standby adults and administrators around the bullies who sit by and do nothing while horrible atrocities happen on their watch.  Your time is up.  The twats are coming for you.  I suggest donning a rain slicker.

 

  • 40,000 Twats for a Cleaner Environment.  Think about it, who says, “Pick it up now and clean your room!” with more aplomb than anyone else on earth.  YOUR MOM.  She’s powerful.  She can get you to do sh*t you hate doing.  Who better then to stop littering?  Smokey the bear?  That crying Indian from those PSAs way back when?  Or…A TWAT MOM.  40,000 of them.  40,000 SCREAMING TWAT MOMS telling teenagers and young hooligans everywhere, “Hey Hip-Hop and Betty-Burnout.  I’m watching you from the baby monitor at the In and Out Burger on La Brea and I noticed that you were going to throw your cheeseburger wrapper on the floor instead of the garbage can 4 feet away from you.  SO.  PICK IT THE FECK UP AND WALK IT THE FECK OVER TO THE TRASH CAN.  THE WORLD IS NOT A PLACE FOR YOU TO SH*T UPON.  SO, PICK UP YOUR TRASH AND THROW IT IN THE PROPER RECEPTACLE.  IF YOU DO NOT, YOU WILL FEEL THE RATH OF 40,000 TWAT MOMS AND I CAN PROMISE YOU, THAT MESS INVOLVES FAR GREATER CLEAN UP THAN YOU PLACING YOUR GARBAGE IN THE PROPER BIN.  Thank you.  Now, please, continue on your date.”

 

Even the most gangster of troublemakers is going to pick up his or her trash after that.

 

Re-directing their powerful lady energies towards more constructive programs like the above should make any Twat-Mom very proud.  My only hope is that the 40,000 twats will listen and do some good, for once.  Sweet Mother, the particular twat writing this, is vibrating with hope and intensity at the very possibility of such an idea.

 

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Photo credits:  feature image, pride float, urban outfit lesbos/huffpost, cute-asian-lesbian, gay-footsies, gay underroos, gay studs kissing, gay lady sailors

116 thoughts on “Re-Directing the Energy of 40,000 Twats

  1. I am totally behind in such American craziness – who doesn’t love Ellen, I am a political nut, but in my reality, nobody should be judged for who they love. For those who judge, I believe they need some love, or an education.

  2. I’m changing my name to Chocolate Twinkie because that’s what I want. (and that has nothing to do with the fact that this is a gay post. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)

      1. I heard they were threatening to do so. Don’t tell me they actually did it? Now I have to go stock up on Twinkies. And I’m on a diet now. WAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

      1. I’ll be comin’ home soon, SweetMother….you’ll know it’s me by the choccy smears around my face…….don’t tell Rob….he’s thinking I’m saving some choccy twinkies for him. Oh…is he ever wrong…………..

  3. i have always had problem with people who have energy to complain and crib about other’s life..i mean no one cares if there is a part of world where kids do not have food and where girls are being held as a property to marry…countries are suffering with so many issues, poverty and hunger…oh we think going Anti Gay is the biggest priority…

  4. 40,000 moms is actually four old men in Pat Robertson’s basement. The truth is that it isn’t even really about ideology or religion, it’s about money.
    Some of these groups unfortunately focus on a very limited platform that is almost exclusively about persecuting and marginalizing the LGBTQ community and/or limiting contraception and women’s reproductive rights.

    Here are some of the biggest and most pernicious:

    -The American Family Association has an annual budget of US$14 million and owns 180 American Family Radio stations in 28 states
    -Focus on the Family has a budget of approximately 150 million per year.
    -Exodus International has an annual budget of 1 million per year
    -Concerned Women for America operates with a 10 million per year budget
    -Coral Ridge Ministries: 65 million per year
    -The Family Research Council spends 14.2 million per year

    In the prop. 8 campaign in California the religious right wasted 40 million dollars. I wonder what real good that money could have done. But wondering is no use, because I know this isn’t a phenomena that’s likely to end. Throwing fuel on the flames of hatred is a money-maker, it’s what makes possible the donations that account for the mega-budgets of hate groups and mega-salaries of the founders and directors of those groups. Imagine making a living without the need for any sort of qualifications, all you have to do is pick a victim, repeat some junk-science and myths, and line your pockets.

    1. oh, believe me, i’m aware of all of their ridiculous antics, but i’m glad you stated them on here nonetheless. have you seen rachel maddow’s brilliant piece on the junk science of de-gaying and the psychologist WHO RECANTED HIS FINDINGS that they’re basing all of their junk science on!!!! it’s unbelievable. i’ll see if i can dig it up for you. xo, sm

  5. Reblogged this on Musing With 305 and commented:
    I just want to say that this is the best blog today, yet again belonging to Sweet Mother. For all you horrible, hypocritical Waay Rightists who are so hateful that even Chuck Norris wants to punch you…..shut the feck up! :D READ THIS!

  6. I *heart* this post. I also poked at “40000 women with nothing better to do than pick gratuitous fights because we are 40000 women with nothing better to do” last week. They suck. You, however, do not suck. You are fabulous.

    Cheers!

    1. you did??!! holy shizer, i must read. heading over to do so now. and thank you for the kind words, christine. it means a lot and momma feels the same about you. xo, sm

      1. It was at the tail end of a damned sad post. You might have missed it.

        You are welcome. Also, thank you. We could keep this going all day…

        Mwah!
        C

  7. Even 40,000 is a ridiculous number for such idiocy. I’ve never heard of “One Million Moms” except in the context of “One Million Moms in Chicago have found that their periods are synched to the same day causing a rash of fist fights at Costco, a shortage of Haagen-Daz java chip deluxe in the frozen food section, and excessive screaming.” I’ll take that over idiot “activist” groups any day of the week. You go, SM.

    1. bwaaaahhhhaaaa, i too would take a menses-infused costco brawl over this shit any day. and i think you were commenting on my blog while i was commenting on yours. WEIRD. hope you’re enjoying the farm…xo, sm

  8. I was watching the Steve Allen show. I was about eight. Liberace was playing, and a busty starlet came out, leaned way over on his piano, and gazed at him. Steve Allen said to her, “Look out, you’re distracting him.” I squinted at Steve and wondered what the heck he was talking about. “He’s not interested in her,” I said to the TV.

    I did not yet know what it was he wasn’t interested in doing with her, but I knew that he wasn’t, that that was okay, because he was Liberace, and that’s who he was. Period. I didn’t yet know what it was I would be interested in doing in a few years, but I would have been able to tell you I was hetero. I might not have known the word, but I would have known that, and I would have known other people might be different from me.

    It’s that basic. I don’t get how other people don’t get that.

    1. ok, that is so well said, martha. i mean SO well said. geez louise, if only the world had your common sense. i too feel it is just as basic as you say. simple, really. and the liberace story is beautiful. seriously. i’m glad you said it here. xoxo, sm

  9. Here are the women’s issues that are near and dear to my heart that I truly wish all women’s organizations in our country (this includes the ones that direct their venom at lesbian issues as well as those like, NOW, who seem to have only one agenda) could come together and get behind:

    1. Freeing the women of the world from the tyranny of the Burqa and the veil. Don’t for one minute think any woman chooses this clothing. If they say they do, they are living in a Stockholm Syndrome situation by their captives–men who believe in a god that condones and demands the abuse of women.

    2. Eliminating female circumcision which is not circumcision but the removal of the clitoris.

    3. Eliminating the imprisonment and stoning of women because of their sexual choices..

    4. Freeing the women of the world, particularly those of African nations, from the rape, enslavement and torture by soldiers and mercenaries hired by dictators to keep their people in line–subservient and dependent on the largess of the leader.

    5. Ending the female slave trade that leads to forced prostitution, drug addiction and a very short life.

    It was only the last century that women obtained the vote in this country. It was only the last century that women began to be treated equally in the workplace. We have yet to have a woman president or vice-president. In short, women of the world must unite and stop their in-fighting. And men of the world must support their efforts.

    So, SM, I understand your anger, but who gives a fat rat’s ass what a few narrow-minded people think. There are larger women’s issues that need a unifying voice. There are women in this world that are brutalized every day of their short lives. Rally the troops, SM. Be their spokesperson! HF

    1. I won’t speak for Sweet Mother, but I give a fat rat’s ass about what these few narrow minded people are doing because their narrow mindedness is turning into restrictive laws that we all have to live with. They are deciding what will and won’t be taught in our schools as well. They are few, they are narrow, but they are mighty just the same. Who says this breed of ignorance is less dangerous than the ones you listed? I don’t.

      1. That’s such bullshit! The progress in this country in these areas has been astronomical and nobody is turning back the hands of the clock. The Westboro Church for godsakes is like 13 cousins and they get more press than the United Nations. Forty-thousand people marching is nothing–the size of a baseball game crowd–and will not change one mind–not even the fickled mind of a politician. Meanwhile half the women in this world -HALF-don’t have enough to eat. They’re regularly abused and used by men. Yet, where are the women’s voices from this Country. They’re too busy fighting among themselves to accomplish grander things and greater goals. Where is the nobility? Where are the greater angels? What a force they would be if they would actually put their differences aside and demand that the world change the lot of women.

      1. Thank you so much for that comment. I bleed for women. I have seen the abuses first hand. I have seen the strong make slaves of the weak. If women of the world are ever going to achieve true equality they must unite as women. Together, their strength could move mountains, but as long as they stay fractured and fighting, their sisters die and die and die and die and die. HF

    2. yes, harper, all of the above points are well made. but, if you read my post and read between the lines of the humor I AM MAKING THE EXACT POINT THAT THESE ENERGIES SHOULD BE DIRECTED ELSEWHERE, LIKE, AND I USE THIS EXACT EXAMPLE — STOPPING CLITORECTOMIES. so, in a sense, i agree, but i ALSO agree with fish — these groups have money where they don’t have numbers and money is POWER in this country and many others. i speak out about atrocities against women ever day and have done so for most of my life, but to say that those deserve a voice and these don’t is missing the point. as for westboro, they get so much press and they ARE like 13 cousins, i know all about it, but i am for the lisa lampanelli approach where you take their protests and their coverage and you turn and twist it into money raising to help gay and female causes, as lisa did. see here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/05/23/lisa-lampanelli-vs-westboro-baptist-church_n_865291.html

      and with all due respect, harper, i reserve the right to speak about what i want, when i want, especially here in this space. one day it may be about 40,000 twats, the other it may be about the burka, as i have done so here: https://sweetmotherlover.wordpress.com/2012/03/24/raising-a-champion/

      much love, mother

      1. lol. you never need to feel corrected on my blog. your voice is a VERY welcome one here and you make very strong, well said, points. believe me, i understand your frustration. there are idiots everywhere and my gender is no exception to such a blight. much love, moms

      2. And, Raising a Champion was really good! So, forgive me oh mighty one for getting overheated. You are the queen! I bow to your wisdom. All joy in reading your blog. HF

      3. harper, bottomline, momma loves you and your writing. and i would never stop one like yourself from fighting the good fight. hopefully, what i was trying to do was explain the intention of the above post. anyhoo, i adore you and i never fault passion. i love yours and lord knows, i have lots of it, as well.

      4. Cut it out! You’re making me tear up. I’ll go watch that Friar’s Club Roast video again and get over it. Now that’s passion! Laughing now. HF

  10. Can’t all of our twats just get along??! I like your twat just fine even though I choose to fill mine with cock, momma. Fuck em!

    1. loooolllllllll. i so agree. i don’t care what anyone puts in their own fleshy coin purse, just stop telling me – 40000 twats – what the hell to do with mine. looolll. xo, momma

  11. For a while, I had subscribed to the One Million Moms mailing list. Every time they sent out a e-blast asking people to write in in protest of something, I would use their template and change it up *just enough* to be a supportive letter.

    It lasted about 2 months before someone there must have noticed and unsubscribed me. I can’t seem to resubscribe either!

  12. Thanks for some more great laughs, Sweet Mother. I was planning to get my fanny out of this chair, but when I saw the title of your post in my email inbox, how could I not click it open right then and there? And I agree–so much energy wasted on such bigotry. Here’s hoping you get boycotted!

    1. am i the only blogger who has ever ASKED for a boycott? maybe i don’t know…altho it may be hard to boycott something done for free. looollll. it sure sounds good tho. xoxo, sm

  13. Hey Twat Moms: think about this one… if your child is gay they won’t “accidently” get pregnant, drop out of school and expect YOU to raise their baby.

    I love Ellen btw!

    1. ellen is soooo the comedy-baby-jesus. and great commentary, chef. i say that to my doc all the time. she says, ‘are you on birth control?’ and i say, ‘no, being gay is the best form of birth control of all…’ at which point she usually turns red and runs away. poor thing. lol. xoxo, momma

      1. Bwaahaahaa!

        I have no issues with gay people, I’ve had a few close friends and family who told me they were gay. One of my lady friends even tried to play matchmaker for me. One of my good guy friends recently came out, right around the time his mom fell ill and passed away – everyone in our circle was very supportive of him (and it explained why he had such a flair for shopping and cooking, we need more of that).
        xxx

  14. GENIUS!
    I try, I really really really try to understand people like the 40K Twats… but I just cannot do it. The word gay shouldn’t even exist, it’s completely useless in my opinion. You’re a woman who likes other women? You’re STILL a WOMAN for crying out loud! You don’t all of a sudden turn into this new species: Gay.
    Gay should go back to its original meaning of happy. I’m going to start doing that. It’ll be the new trend one day.. you’ll see.. Should I change my name to Didi Gay-IS-Happy?? Would that make the transition go quicker? I bet it would.
    And in all honesty, I’m going to shop at Urban Outfitters and JCP now so I won’t run into people like them :) <– makes me way happier!!

    1. i think you SHOULD patronize both urban outfitters and the penny, i mean, come on. and as far as trying to understand them…i never try to understand the stupid, it’s a waste of my valuable time. you, however, are a sweet gift, little didiita. xoxo, mother

  15. They definitely need their energy redirected. May I suggest that they spend some time pulling their heads out of their asses? :-P

  16. Just another group of people who want to restrict other people’s rights based on their own morality, but then turn right around and complain about how the government is too involved in our lives and about the restrictions being placed on their freedoms. Just doesn’t make sense to me. Such hypocrisy.

  17. Not that I am hating on you– I am a very non-judgmental person– but you kinda passed judgment on baby pageants there. I am not about exploiting my children or anything, but I am planning on entering my daughter into one. I guess that makes me a whacko in your eyes? I hope not, though. I am a pretty normal gal (and I don’t give a crap who gets married to who, it’s not my business to dictate someone else’s happiness. Word, yo). I like reading your take on life, Sweet Mother. You certainly give a point of view that I have never considered. And, heterosexual as I am, I can totally understand why women fall in love with other women. We are, after all, such a sexy bunch of mammals! ;)

    1. Listen gurl, I am so for pagents if they help kids in a positive way. For ex, I loved that lil sweetie at the pagent in the film ‘lil miss sunshine’. It’s when shit gets all Jon benet ramsey that I don’t understand it and some of those moms in toddlers and tiaras go too far imho. But I didn’t say all moms and every pagent. Perhaps u enjoy this events w ur kid in a balanced way and I’m all for that. Xo sm

  18. I can be homo with a British accent. Actually, I AM a homo with a British accent. Therefore, if I participate here there will be an international conspiracy angle for the 1 million moms too.

    You are all agents of an international European socialist conspiracy to destroy the morals of America now. So, moms, get boycotting already. And can you boycott my blog too? I could use the exposure.

    Furthermore, as a homo (with a British accent), I think that your use of ‘twats’ is funny. I love how British words are invading the US. Bollocks. Wank. Twats. Love it.

      1. I’m all for cultural exchanges of secret european socialist homosexual conspiracies. But is that a different agenda than the homosexual one? I’m never told these things.

      2. no one ever tells me these things either! however, i say we just throw it into the soup. i’m happy to butter the chaos on with you thickly…the world needs it. wink, wink. momma

    1. We are all lucky I didnt use that other fabulous British word sounds like cooooonts, rhymes w runts! Lllloiiiiioolllllll. We love all British gay men and fabulous lady lezs here, my love. So glad u stopped by as ur comment was hilarious. Xo mum

      1. Well, people are so upset when the smokers among us friendlily ask “Give us a fag, mate” when we’re over there. I’m sure there is some cultural difference that I don’t know about. Sort of like asking for a fanny pack over here.

  19. You didn’t stop in my library because I have a copy of Sammy the Squirrel Tries to Indoctrinate Gerry the Groundhog Into the Homosexual Agenda but Jesus the Christ Stops Him Along with the Power of 40,000 or 1 Million Twats. I like to read it for my Christmas story hour.

  20. Unless homosexual is a secret word for child-molesting-serial-killer these women should just aim their sights at something else. What a waste of their energy when there are so many more things that could benefit from their attention! Of course being blacklisted by the Westboro idiots is something everyone should welcome!

    I am now thinking of changing my blog name to ‘you will obey’ in the hopes that I can gain control of the masses. Lets just hope the 40,000 don’t think of that one!

    1. loooolllll. i don’t think they’d ever use ‘you will obey’ – too accurate or them. they’d call it something like ‘american federation for the upholding of family values and boring church picnics’ – but, they’d mean YOU WILL OBEY. hogwash, really. xo, mother

  21. If there was ever an award for the best blog post title ever, then “Redirecting the energy of 40,000 twats” would be a prime contender for top honours IMO.
    Those insecure pillocks shout and scream out of complete, unadulterated fear… fear that their own children might actually turn out to be gay. And so they try to spread that fear so they can fall back on other people’s (indoctrinated by them) prejudice and thereby relinquish personal responsibility for their own disgusting behaviour.
    I hope they all conceive gayer-than-gay offspring and thereby have a life sentence of mental suffering and self-doubt.
    You rock, Mama !!!

    1. mee, you are a wonderful gift to the world and this blog! thank you for your sweet comment. and i am so with you…i hope they have gaggles of gay children, so many that they have to have an lgbt center right in their own feckin’ living rooms. looollll. xoxo, sm

  22. Charity begins at home. And so does hate. The hate that killed Kenneth James Weishuhn, that disrupted his funeral, that desecrated his grave with laughter and ‘glad he’s dead’ began somewhere. Follow the breadcrumb trail and it will lead to a Million Moms passing their savage hatred on through their breast milk. We give birth to make LIFE. I thought that by speaking out to mothers I could start a wave of outrage happening but it seems that mothers are part of the problem.

    Thanks Mum. I didn’t know about those twats before, could not even imagine such an organization being possible but now I know where to direct the rage that’s been boiling over with nowhere to go.

    I am NOT going to stand by in silence while more children decide that dying is the only way out.

    love
    Andrea

      1. -hugs- I think you’ve saved my sanity today Mum. I wanted to do something so badly but did not know where to point my anger. Now I do. One Million Moms are going to feel my anger. It may not be much but I’m hoping that if all the mums who don’t belong to that awful organization make a stand something good will come out of this.

        -big hugs-

  23. Hahaha, if these twats are an off-shoot of the Super friends, I guarantee the Wonder Twins started it. Always relegated to second fiddle. Or second and third fiddles. Wait, didn’t they have a monkey or some animal with them? I’m not counting him as the fourth fiddle, that’s ridiculous. That’s too many fiddles. I don’t care if he get’s mad… I think any organization that has Family, Morals, or God in their name are probably not any of those things. Hate groups in sun dresses and sweater vests.

    1. “I think any organization that has Family, Morals, or God in their name are probably not any of those things. Hate groups in sun dresses and sweater vests.” i SOOOOO comedy-love-you, bill. xoxo, sm

  24. Love it. A couple things:

    1. I totally got suckered in by the headline and it wasn’t at all what I thought it’d be. Well done.

    2. This was an actual headline today: World Peace Suspended. Nice timing.

    3. I lived for a large chunk of my life in Topeka, home of the WBC, and we all die just a little bit inside every time someone mentions them. People giving them attention is the only reason they’re still around. If nobody paid them any attention, they’d probably just sit inside and circle jerk or something. It’s the reason they started with the picketing of funerals–nobody in Topeka gave a shit about them anymore.

    4. Is there a special repository for those gay images? Like the LGBTQ version of Shutterstock? Gaystock? Only that sounds like a music festival headlined by George Michael and the Indigo Girls.

    1. gaystock – a music festival headed by george michael and the indigo girls. bwwwaaahhhhaaaa, so awesome, ande. yeah, i hear you about wbc, but they’re just sooo fun to make fun of that i can’t stop myself sometimes. and i listen to the news pretty regularly, so that meta world peace thingy must’ve snuck in there somehow. it’s amazing what we absorb. thanks for commenting, friend. i enjoyed reading it. sm

  25. Great headline — totally brought me into the post (tho I do wish you wouldn’t use our body parts to dis others)

    BUT, I completely agree with you (sorry, I can’t bring the boycott, but what great publicity that will be when Fred catches on to you, haha)

    The thing 1,ooo,ooo Moms completely misses: a lot of lesbians are moms too. Go figure…………

    1. great comment, mindful. we will, however, have to agree to disagree though, as i LOVE to use all bodyparts to disrespect others (both male and female, i am equal opportunity that way), especially when they deserve it. you get the overall message tho and momma most certainly loves that. ;) much love, mother

  26. Another brilliant blog Sweet Mother! I LOL’ed the whole way through!

    May I ask where gratuitous gay image #3 went? It goes right from 2 to 4…..it must’ve been one hot photo to get banned from your post! ;)

  27. You may not want to do politics, but you do it so well. I love your suggestions for the twats to redirect their energy, especially the first one. Only problem is that none of these women has ever used the word twat, or coont for that matter, and especially not fegging coont.

    You’re probably too young to remember, but when the Moral Majority tried to run this country in the 80’s, a crop of bumper stickers appeared that read thus: “The Moral Majority is Neither.” Just like these 1 million moms are a few Lifesavers short of a roll.

  28. Sweet Mother,
    Even with our flawed, when I read a post like yours, I’m proud to be Canadian. AND proud to have you as an American friend, seeing that you do what you can to make a difference.
    Le Clown

  29. So a while back when the Ellen/JC Penney protest was getting some ink I went to the OMM website. There’s a testimonial section. Testimonials seemed strange to me since this is a belief these people share and not a product they all bought. But I digress. This is a testimonial I found and it just makes me laugh. This woman can’t be bothered by writing pesky letters. If only she could find other organizations to outsource her care giving to (not that I think OMM is a good source of care giving, but you know what I mean). Here’s her testimonial, maybe you’ll find it as funny as I did…enjoy
    – As a full-time working single mom…I have SO many concerns about the impact media has on my teenage son, but precious little time to DO anything about it. OMM has given me a voice without taking up a lot of my valuable time. I am able to make a difference thanks to OMM! In the past, I would WANT to write a network about offensive programming – I just could never find the time. Thanks OMM for helping me to take a stand! Keep up the fight to encourage the sponsors to consider where they spend their advertising budgets! I appreciate you!

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